Failure to control your anger effectively may result in a range of difficulties, including regrettable statements, shouting at your children, threatening co-workers, sending hasty emails, developing health problems, and even turning to physical violence. However, not all instances of fury are that grave. Rather than that, your anger may manifest itself via time spent contemplating distressing events, being annoyed in traffic, or screaming about work. Consider counselling or life coaching if your anger management is getting out of hands.
Managing your anger does not imply that you will never get furious. Rather than that, it is learning how to identify, manage, and express one’s anger in a healthy and constructive manner. Everyone can improve their ability to handle their anger. Even if you believe you have mastered your anger, there is always opportunity for progress.
Determine Triggers
If you’ve developed a habit of losing your temper, consider what causes your rage. Long lines, traffic jams, snide remarks, or extreme exhaustion are just a few of the reasons that might make you lose your temper.
While you should not blame others or external situations for your failure to maintain your composure, recognizing what causes your anger will assist you in planning properly.
You may opt to restructure your day in order to better manage your stress. Alternatively, you might practice some anger control skills prior to encountering situations that normally bother you. By doing these steps, you may help prolong your fuse—meaning that a single annoying event will not set you off.
Assess Your Anger
Before you take steps to calm yourself, consider if your fury is a friend or an adversary. If you are witnessing a violation of someone’s rights or are in an unhealthy setting, your anger may be beneficial.
In these instances, you may choose to intervene by altering the circumstance rather than your emotional state. Occasionally, your anger serves as a signal that something else has to change, such as an emotionally abusive relationship or a poisonous friendship.
If, on the other hand, your anger is causing you grief or jeopardizing your relationships, it may be an adversary. Additionally, this form of rage manifests itself via a sense of being out of control and afterwards regretting your words or actions. It makes sense in these instances to concentrate on managing your emotions and calming yourself down.
Consider your words before you speak.
It’s easy to say something in the heat of the moment that you’ll regret afterwards. Before speaking, take a few seconds to gather your thoughts – and let those engaged in the issue to do the same. Once you’ve regained your composure, convey your dissatisfaction in an aggressive yet nonconfrontational manner. Express your worries and wants plainly and directly, without inflicting harm or attempting to exert control over others.
Engage in physical activity
Physical exercise might help alleviate the tension that can make you furious. If you see your anger rising, take a quick walk or run, or engage in other fun physical activity.
Recognize Red Flags
If you’re like some individuals, you may feel as if your rage comes out of nowhere. Perhaps you can go from calm to enraged in an instant. However, there are usually warning signals that your anger is increasing. Recognizing them early might assist you in taking measures to keep your anger from boiling over. Consider the bodily symptoms of rage that you encounter. Perhaps your heart is racing or your cheeks is flushed.
Alternatively, you may begin to tighten your fists. Additionally, you may experience some cognitive alterations. Perhaps your thoughts begins to race or you experience “red vision.” By identifying your warning signals, you may take prompt action and avoid doing or saying things that contribute to the development of larger issues. Pay attention to your feelings and you’ll improve your ability to recognize warning flags.
Determine potential solutions
Rather of dwelling on what enraged you, concentrate on settling the current conflict. Is your child’s untidy room driving you insane? Shut the door. Is your companion always late for dinner? Schedule night-time meals — or accept to dine alone a few times a week. Remind yourself that anger will not resolve any issues and may rather exacerbate them.
Maintain an emphasis on ‘I’ phrases
To avoid criticizing or assigning blame — which will only serve to heighten tension – express the situation using “I” phrases. Be considerate and precise. For instance, instead saying “You never do any housekeeping,” say, “I’m disappointed that you left the table without offering to assist with the dishes.”
Bear no grudges
Forgiveness is a very effective technique. Allowing anger and other bad emotions to suffocate happy emotions may result in being eaten up by your own bitterness or sense of unfairness. However, if you are able to forgive someone who has irritated you, you may be able to learn from the event while also strengthening your friendship.
Richmond Counselling by Daniela Marinova is providing one of the best counselling sessions for people suffering with anger management.
